Elective Decisions

Chicago—As his transition continues in full swing, Senator Barack Obama, D-IL, has announced that Reverend Jeremiah Wright will deliver his swearing in invocation on January 20, 2009, to help “begin the healing process of the racial divide in America.”

The announcement comes after the election of the first black President of the United States, and according to newly appointed Chief of Staff, Rahm Emmanuel, is “an indication of just how President-elect Obama plans to rule America.”

“The time has come for Americans to pay for the sins of the past,” claimed Emmanuel.  “The equalization of America has begun, and having Reverend Wright at his invocation is definitely a poke in the eye of racist conservatives.  You gotta love that!”

“This is great news,” quipped Countdown host, Keith Olbermann.  “America’s vote still resonates clearly.  America, you said you were racist, and now all your sins can be washed away.”

“I feel so clean,” declared CBS News anchor, Katie Couric.  “I have felt so dirty for years, and Obama’s election means I am free of this burden.  So having Reverend Wright is just another reminder that America still has a long way to go.”

Many have speculated that Obama’s election has significantly closed the racial gap.  No one is sure, however, how long it will take before America has divested itself of its past evil ways?  Only time will tell, but one thing is for sure, and that is—in the words of Reverend Wright—“America’s chickens have come home…to roost.”